Five Months Apart
It's been five months since my spouse and I separated. I've come to use the term, ' estranged spouse ' because I feel the need for a name. For financial reasons - for starters, health insurance, pensions, and survivor benefits - it seems more just to perma-separate rather than divorce. We've had advice on this. Parts of it are terrible. It's been difficult personally. My life feels empty. I feel shame at this failure. It's been hard for my kids (ages 24 and 28). I moved out of town, to a place where I could live much cheaper. The isolation of this small town is a negative for me, compared to what I think I'd experience in the city. Parts of it are healthier than where I was pre-split. I feel more like myself. I feel less stress. My use of "as-needed" drugs is significantly reduced. We talk cordially. We discuss money, the kids, the logistics: cars, houses, etc.