Back story and A Sign of Progress
Then my wife and I went to M for marriage counseling. Again, M split us up for separate counseling and then periodically saw us together. M was brilliant, had a MSW, and focused on Christian counseling. There came a time when M told be that "you might be better served by another counselor" and she fired me but she recommended a gestalt practitioner because I needed to reconnect my left and right hemispheres.
I went to see X, who was a Christian counselor and wanted to make sure I was right with the Almighty before we got into my specifics. I told him I wasn't there for that, but X insisted. X told me that their goal was for me to come to see X as a manifestation of Christ, and that was when I knew I was done with X even though they had a MSW.
I struck out on my own and started looking for gestalt practitioners in Google. Several phone calls, very few return calls. I ended up visiting with M2 and they offered to take me on. M2 was a few years older than me, had a knock-around life story, and we got on well. M2 is brilliant and a PhD.
My wife and I saw the need for additional marriage counseling, so we looked into Systems Theory counselors and found J who was brilliant, and has a MSW.
When M2 and I uncovered trauma and PTSD from two sources, we talked about using EMDR to help connect my hemispheres and my memories and I found myself in the good hands of C. C was very good and was a PhD.
I felt the need, and M2 concurred, for a bit of group support among fellow travelers, so I started going to an every-other week group session for men who'd been sexually abused as children which was run by D, PhD.
At times I saw M twice a week; once for myself and once as a couple. At peak scheduling, I saw M2 twice a week for gestalt therapy, J once a week for marriage counseling, C once a week for EMDR, and D every other week for group therapy. This was just too much for me and we reduced M2 to once a week, which results in 4 hours/week one week, and 3 hours/week the next week.
I also had the benefit of a psychiatrist for depression meds and a neurologist for my hallucinations; also I had a great GP-doctor.
It was a good thing I was retired, had my own car, and could afford the gas, mileage, time, and co-payments. These meetings and all the processes were a lot of work.
The EMDR was never planned to be a prolonged experience. I worked on that for about a year and was getting into diminishing returns. I'm convinced it was valuable and beneficial to me.
The men's group was continually struggling for attendance. Eventually the therapist shut it down because it wasn't sustainable.
When my marriage turned into separation, I stopped going to marriage counseling although we both went separately to J for individual advice, with the other's concurrence.
I started intermittently attending some Bear events, and some Bi events, to get to spend some time with other people like me. This was valuable but involved more time and mileage.
Today M2 and I discussed my status, what I see happening next, and what I need. He suggested we go from weekly to every other week - or perhaps I should say, bi-weekly. Sorry. I took that as a sign of progress. I've been seeing M2 for about three years, I was afraid it was going to take ten.
I don't think I'm anywhere near done. I expect there's a normal learning curve with plateaus, etc. It's nice to see that the professional sees signs of progress.